Bite my Tongue

Slowly Rin climbed the stairs of the Spire, having sat in thought for some time now. He had decided that whatever he deliberated, it was pointless without her actually there. He knew the likelihood of her being there was slim for now, but sooner or later she was likely to arrive. He knew for a fact she liked this spot, and therefore it would only be a matter of time. Personally time he could use, espeically when he still had so many thoughts he could not work out for himself.
Sitting at the top of the stairs he could see and hear if anyone came up, but he would only move whenever she arrived, hopefully alone. He was not particularly sure what he would say though, and the fact that there was still a hole in the floor was problematic. He noticed the plank of wood they had removed from the rubble, and he decided if necessary that would work. However he did not want to move it just yet in case a human that was not Miriam arrived and tried to use it to sneak past. He was unarmed, remembering Alastair, and therefore useless if they happened to be.

Miriam climbed the stairs to the spire cold, wet, tired and grumpy. She had gone looking for Proteus in the kitchen where he had promised to be, but she had found it empty. She knew she had left him for a long time, but not knowing where he was now had an annoying effect on her.
Almost as a force of habit she swept the room with her eyes in case of danger, but without suspecting anything harmful up here, there was never anyone but her. When she saw Rin however she jumped backwards in surprise as well as sudden fear, but quickly pulled herself together, looking at him instead with a mix of a confused puppy look and a hateful glare, uncertain of his purpose.
The sight of him made her tighten her grip around her own knife until her knuckles were red. Though she had already won their game of mental torturing, this didn't help to calm her fears. In fact, knowing he no longer had a reason to keep her alive would only make her more weary of him, and she didn't dare speaking until he did. She had nothing left to say to him.

He stood up, trying to process the feeling at the pit of his stomach as he looked at her. He had been thinking of what exactly he was going to say, but now that she was here he could not remember anything he had planned. Instead he just looked back.
He wanted to ask her what she had done, or at the very least help him to translate whatever it was that made him feel sick. Even if demons had pushed aside their humanity, it was still what they were. And all he could assume, since all it had caused him was weakness, was that this was the human of him pushing itself to the surface. However saying any of this would make him seem weak, and even if she already knew this he was far too stubborn to give in to that.
'I was waiting for you' he said, flat and emotionless.

Her heart skipped a beat at the sound of his voice, and another one at the realization of his words. As always she had tried to remain calm around him, but as always she had failed the second he spoke to her. He was too far away to notice her small reactions, or at least she hoped, and so she sticked to watching him with weary eyes, wondering what he was up to. Quickly she searched him for weapons with her eyes, but found none. He couldn't possibly be trying to kill her here, it would be impossible to even cross, and so her expression became puzzled.
"What would you do that for?" she asked, forcing herself to keep her voice as flat and emotionless as his was.

He shrugged. 'I am deliberating over some things, and I had a feeling your presence would help me.'
His mind flashed back to Lillith and him in the Crypt, and how he had remembered her for no reason. She had gotten under his skin, and now it was too far gone. Already had he got too used to her. He knew that if Calicifer did suceed then at least this problem would be solved for him. It was prehaps the best solution, however he himself could not bring himself to think like that. At least if it were to occur then it would not be by choice on his part.
Looking at her directly, even if he probably should not, he felt himself drawn in. He remembered what he had left her with, the situation similar to now. He could not help himself, and it was a feeling he hated.
Repulsed he looked away finally. 'I hope you have kept yourself amused' he smirked, feeling the sweat under his misplaced clothes and remembering what he had done in the meanwhile, even if all they had been was a means of keeping her out of his head.

His behavior unnerved her, and it somehow scared her as she had never seen him quite like this before. She couldn't help but wonder what he was up to and why. No matter what he chose to tell her, he could not harm her from the distance that kept them apart, and it would be useless to try.
She couldn't get herself to understand his definition of amusement, but she figured it was obvious from her soaked, cold, shivering, exhausted wreck of a body that she was clearly not in any sense of the word amused. If anything she wanted to crawl up in a dark hole, fall asleep and never awake to the cruel world she found herself in now. To be honest, anywhere would be good, as long as it was far away from here.
"Don't worry, your friends kept my company," she said, annoyance clear in her voice as she remembered back to the obnoxious demon she had spent the last couple of days with. His yellow eyes still haunted her in her sleep, and the memories of the excrusiating pain made her cringe still. The fact that one of them had powers made her scared others might also, though she doubted it applied to Rin. He would have already used them if that was the case.

'Friends?' he asked, concerned not for her own well-being but that yet another demon may know something about him that was not entirely pleasing as far as Lillith was concerned.
He already knew that demons talked, and that information in a place like this was essentially a source of power. However he hoped that spending any limited time with Miriam was not enough to bring him up in conversation. Still he could not help but grow worried as to what he would return to, and whether or not Calcifer would be the first demon to speak to Lillith unfavourably about him.

She rolled her eyes, not having expected to have to explain to him.
"Dark hair, yellow eyes, obnoxious breath and the charm of a waste grinder?" She wasn't going to tell him about the pain he had inflicted on her, nor the kiss they had shared, as none of it was relevant. To be frank, she already found this conversation stupid and pointless.
"Was there something you wanted?" she said in a sigh, almost exasperated, clearly not wanting to stay much longer. In reality, she wanted nothing more than to stay for as long as she could, but she knew that was the exact reason she was now forcing herself to stay away for her own good.

He recognised it was Azazel fairly easily, as if the yellow eyes didn't already give it away. He also knew that when he had last seen him he had been walking over to Lillith, and he had left them alone to say whatever they wanted. He sighed, unsure what he would return to now, and therefore decided that listening to Calcifer was pretty much pointless considering the likelihood of others telling was equally as high.
'Not particularly' he said, frowning. He looked at her, knowing she would probably leave soon. 'Calcifer still wants your soul' he said, almost warning her. 'Keep that in mind when you next meet him.'
There was a hint of pleading in his voice, unintentionally, but he hoped for once she would listen to him and stay out of harms way.

She looked at him sceptically as if not trusting his words for more than one reason.
"You climbed to the spire unarmed and waited for me God knows how long just so you could tell me something I already know?" she asked, raising an eyebrow as if this would somehow emphasize how stupid he was sounding to her. He was hiding something from her, and she had the feeling whatever it was could be dangerous for her. Ignoring his plea she was more focused on figuring what he was up to.

'Not exactly' he admitted, although he was not sure exactly what is was either. 'Like I said before, I've been told to make a decision and I decided that it would be easier if the subject in question was in front of me' he smiled, more gently than prehaps his normal smirk.
'But its pretty obvious that there is little need to consider it now' he decided. 'Besides... I didn't like the options I was being given anyways.'

"I feel so popular," she said sarcastically with an unafraid grin as she sat down. It was nothing but a facade to hide the true fear boiling within her, threatening to make her panic any coming second. She could not let him see how afraid she truely was in fear of mockery.
She sat down at the edge of the hole, dangling her legs off the edge while she looked over at him on the other side. She wanted to leave, but felt she couldn't. Whatever he was about to tell her, she felt it important and necessary to listen to. Whatever reason he had come here, she knew there was a reason. There always was with him, and as long as she didn't know, she couldn't trust him.
"What were the options then?" she asked, honestly curious, but doubted he would tell her.

'That doesn't concern you' he said simply, ignoring the fact that it clearly did. He knew that if he told her then she would simply respond similarly to Calcifer, and he did not want that either, even if he didn't want her to leave.
'I just needed to think, so I came here' he muttered unconvincingly. 'Thought this might put a few things in perspective.'
He looked at her as she sat down, realising they had but not how he had hoped. He was now just more certain that when he returned he would be in a worse situation and sooner than later excommunicated, whilst at the same time sure that he did not want to kill her. In fact he was content just where they were now.

She glared at him slightly, knowing he would probably never tell her even before she asked, but the fact she had been right was annoying her. The more he refused to say the more confused and curious she got. He had come her for a reason, but now, as a child changing his mind at the last second he had decided to keep it from her anyway. And just as a child of five years old, he was an equally bad liar at that time.
"Good luck with that," she said and got to her feet. If he was not about to answer any of her questions, she could not see the point in making small, pityful conversation with this creature. He had obviously wanted her there, as he had waited for her, and somehow she hoped that by threatening to leave he would let her in on at least a little bit more than he currently was. Or at least she hoped...

'Wait' he said, hesistantly, but not wanting her to go he felt that he may as well say so.
'It was just a little dispute with Calcifer.. concerning him talking to Lillith.' He shrugged it off as seemingly meaningless, hoping that she would not ask further.
'It does not matter anyway. I'm sure my days in her favour are already limited now.'
He knew she would not care, nor should he be particually revealing any weak links, as he supposed this was. However he did not see how this could have particular consequences, no more damaging than what they had already shared.

She was about to turn around, but stopped mid-motion and looked at him again, uncertain whether or not to trust him.
"What do you want from me?" she asked straight out. It was what she had been wondering ever since she found him up there. He had told her he was waiting for her, and found it odd he would be waiting for her for no particular reason. Obviously something else was behind, something he was not telling, and she wanted to know what. She would never feel comfortable around him, but the tension she felt now at the fear of something dangerous or threatening he was reluctant to share with her made her almost desperate to find out why he had wanted to see her.

'I don't know' he eventually said. 'I already told you as much earlier.'
In all honesty he had just wanted to see her again- to decide as to whether or not he could kill her was one reason, but in reality he had been planning on doing as soon as they had last left. He needed to figure out what was making him act like this, and she had the explanations.
He sighed. 'I was thinking this may have helped..'
He knew that there were many possible reasons that he was not willing to consider, deep-rooted human problems. He was still insistent that he could not be so infected by whatever this was, but now he was growing concerns.

"You're not making any sense!" she laughed frustrated, but sat back down, curious as to what he would say, and though he made no sense, she was still trying to figure out a meaning behind them. Unsuccessful however, she began to carve random patterns in the wood she was sitting on with her newfound knife in her hand. Now that she finally had one again, she would not easily let it go.
The patterns began as innocent circles, before they gradually became childish hearts she etched out as soon as she had drawn them.
"What would I supposedly help you with?" she asked, interpreting his words as some kind of pathetic plea for help. Not so long ago he had told her he did all the work himself, without being low enough to make others do it for him. This seemed to somehow contradict that statement.

'Trying to figure out my head' he muttered, figuring if he was here then he might as well get to the point.
He looked up at her frustrated however, realising fairly quickly that she was mocking him. 'Of course it doesn't make sense,' he said, 'or else I would not be concerned over it!'
He sat down as she was, annoyed but still seeing no option but to stay.

She stared at him in surprise, fighting the strong urge to ask what the hell was wrong with him, but seeing as the last time she had asked him that he had only gotten worse, she decided to let it be. The more she talked, the more frustrated he got, and so she decided it better to keep quiet altogether, instead awaiting whatever he was about to tell her, bracing herself for the worst of bad news. If even Rin was concerned, something must be horribly wrong, and just the desperate tone of his voice made her skin crawl in anticipation of something horrible to come.
"What's wrong?" she asked simply, a hint of fear in her voice, but she doubted he would notice in his current state.

'I doubt you would phrase it as wrong personally' he smiled weakly. 'But considering what I am it is.'
He pondered for a moment how to word it. 'To put it bluntly I cannot kill you' he sighed. 'As I'm sure you are fully aware' he smirked. 'And word is spreading fast it would seem.'
Bitterly he looked down. 'Demons don't have any reason to stick together when their own prey divides.'
He knew that there was little she could say, but it was still problematic for him.

"I'm sorry, but I don't get what you're whining about," she said in a sigh as she laid down on the floor, looking up at the empty sky above her. The solution seemed far too easy to her, and she was sure he was not too stupid to have thought of it himself. She had understood his desire to keep her alive while they were playing their games, but their last meeting put an end to whatever they had been playing.
There was no longer any reason to keep her alive, and if killing her would bring him pride, honor, popularity, whatever he wanted to gain, she could not believe he wouldn't simply just do it. She had volunteerily given him many chances, even daring him to at times. If anyone were to kill her she was sure it would turn out to be Rin. He was the only one she could surrender to like that, voluntarily or not.
"I gave you so many chances, what the hell are you hesitating for?" she asked flatly, obviously not wanting him to kill her, but at the same time the conversation was quickly growing tiresome and stupid. She could not even believe he was whining to her, showing such a clear emotional breakdown, and such weakness. She knew she was as tired and weak herself, but never would she let him see her in such a position, and she would specially not ever complain to him or seeking advice. They were far from friends, and she did not even share those things with what could be considered her friends.

'Well,' he said bitterly, annoyed at her. 'Its hardly my fault if you lack the sheer understanding to comprehend what I mean when I say I cannot do something.'
'Its not a matter of not having had the right oppurtunity. I cannot' he said, growing increasingly frustrated as he said it. He was by now having to have doubts as to why he had even considered coming to her. She was not helping, merely aggrivating the situation, which was clearly displayed in his mannerisms as he became more and more annoyed. Furthermore there was little he could do about it. He did not know really what he had expected her to say or do, and he assumed that whatever she would have done it would have been of little comfort to him. However his anger over the fact that nothing had changed made him snap out at her, making himself seem even more pathetic than before.
'Its not like I had any problems beforehand. You have done something, and I want to know what' he glared her way.

As much as she wanted to understand him, she couldn't make sense of his words. That was, until his last sentence made everything so obvious, but at the same time so much more confusing, to her. It took her a few seconds to comprehend what he was saying, and she simply stared back at him with wide eyes and a gaping mouth in pure shock at what he was insinuating. She had never expected that of him.
When the shock faded she bursted out laughing, louder than he had ever heard her laugh before. Completely unable to calm herself she could not help but find the idea far too bizzare. Even if he had not been a demon, she would consider the idea absurd as they were enemies to the full meaning of the word. They both hated each other with the fire only they could hate, but at the same time, didn't she as well have her fair doubts at times..? As the laughter subdued she simply stared at him with a confused, yet almost hopeful expression.
"You're not serious," she stated as if this could be the only explanation for his words. This had to be a bad joke.

He glared back at her. 'Serious about what?'
Her laughter had annoyed him to such an extent that he had already got up and was ready to walk away. He could not take being mocked like that, which far surpassed her normal comments. To him it just came across as smug, as if she was rubbing it in his face whatever he already was hating that had happened to him.
He gritted his teeth and clenched his fist, unable to do anything to her since there was still a gap in the floor. Personally he was glad, as that prevented him from doing anything rash. Although right now he only wanted to grab her by the throat and remove the patronising look on her face he knew that this could not be trusted to last if he was any closer to her.