Screaming on The Inside

Miriam had been sitting in the spire for several minutes after Rin had left, but finally decided she should leave and stood up.
Sighing, she went for the stairs, taking one last glance at the spire before she walked downstairs. She wanted to get back to Proteus before he woke up, but quickly realized she had already been too late. Proteus was standing right before her as she walked down into the hall, and she quickly opened her mouth, speechless. However, she refused to let her pride be broken just because she was caugth sneaking out. She was a grown woman after all, well capable of making her own decisions, and she had nothing to be embarrassed about, but she could not help the feeling what she had done was wrong.
"I thought you were sleeping," she muttered, staring him right in the eyes, refusing to look down.

"I just woke up." he replied to her with a smile "Did you sleep a bit too?" he asked interested, and in his tone was obvious he wasn't judging her.

His voice annoyed her to some extent, knowing he had been sure to hear them if he had stood this close to the stairs the whole time. Acting like nothing only made her feel far more guilty, and so she simply waved him off, not in the mood to talk about such trivial things.
"I wasn't tired," she said simply, but as she walked past him she could feel it was a lie. Though she had denied herself the rest, convincing herself she was far from tired, she could now feel the consequences her choices had on her body, and she leaned against a wall for support.

"O...k..." he replied, looking in the same time how tired she seemed "but if you should need to sleep... if you want i can guard again" he continued, keeping himself to support her

"Shut up," she muttered annoyed as she heard the doubt and hesitation in his voice. Her anger wasn't directed at him as much as Rin, but as Rin had already left she felt it far easier to take it out on Proteus. Everything he said and did in that moment annoyed her beyond reason.
"There's no way across the spire," she told him as she calmed down a little, wanting to change the subject to something a little less annoying. "We can't get past there, and I'm not risking my ass on your suicide mission through the entrance wing."

Proteus rolled his eyes at her reply: why had she to be so aggressive? His head still hurted and he wasn't in the best mood to undergo her anger. He was already starting to leave when she talked again "That's ok... we can find another way to get some weapons... or to exorcise the demons"

"You exorcise them!" she yelled, clearly frustrated. Her head was hurting, her heart was aching and her whole being was tired. Everything hurt and she was so sick of doing this all on her own. No one else would even dare to leave the rectory by choice. Thomas had, but she was certain he was already dead now as he had stood up to a yellow-eyed demon. She was always the one to do everything, but why?
"I'm so sick of it!" she kept going, but her voice was breaking, not allowing her to yell anymore. Instead, angry, frustrated tears was forming in her eyes, and though she tried to blink them away, they were quickly falling down her cheeks, leaving wet trails.

He raised an eyebrow when she yelled at him, and when she finished saying that she was 'so tired of it' he just sighed.
"I would like to help you Miriam, but you don't want help: you wanna only complain about how useless are all the people that are around you and do everything on your own. If this makes you happy, go on, i'm nobody to stop you. If you change your mind, i'll be in the kitchen." He was too stressed himself to be as kind as usual, and she was really pulling too much the rope: he hadn't been totally rude, but neither gentle. WIthout another word, he walked back toward the kitchen.

As he walked away from her she let the tears run freely down her face and she kicked the wall supporting her several times before frustrated walking away. She ran out of the rectory, wanting to finish the trap she had already started on. If anyone saw the half-finished trap before it was done and covered in rubbles, no one would be foolish enough to walk into it. Though she was weak and having a mental break down, she knew it was better to finish it soon. She had planned on doing it in the morning, but now she needed to do something to keep her sane.